Sunday, November 28, 2010

Ladies, Don't Do This!

Top Three Things Straight Men ABSOLUTELY HATE!

1) Purple Nurple- Apparently most men do not like for a woman to touch, lick, or even flick their nipples. Obviously men feel as though the idea of nipples is a female thing and do not believe that a man should, or even would, get the slightest amount of sensation in that area. Dear men, let me just tell you that you are missing out on some things. While not every woman is even going to attempt to tickle your nipple sensation, some are not only willing, but eager to do so. In fact, I blame the women who DO NOT do this for the reason behind men believing their nipples should not be touched. For those of you that don’t know anything about this, the male nipple is just as sensitive as the female. Those men, who have actually experienced CORRECT nipple play, have found that they enjoyed it very much. All I am saying is that you shouldn’t knock it until a woman does it the right way.

2) Tushy Touch- Now I can totally understand this one right here. Most men would probably smack a woman for engaging in anal play for many reasons. One being that they are completely uncomfortable with the idea of something touching near, or inside, the anal cavity. However, what I don’t like is that men will attribute this with being gay. Is it gay when a woman allows a man to enter inside of her anally? No, but because other men do this to each other and this is considered to be the way that gay men would have intercourse, straight men believe that a woman should not even consider touching them in this way. I have news for you though fellas, anal stimulation seems to be even more thrilling for men than some women. While I am not suggesting you let your woman ram you with her hidden strap-on, I am telling you that if she is into that type of thing maybe allow her a finger. (Especially if you’re trying to get into her no-no area.)

3) The Tip- This is hilarious and I completely agree with it. Men HATE it sooooo much when a woman says she will give him oral satisfaction, but only focuses at the tip. Now women, I know you have read that the tip is where feeling is most heightened. HOWEVER, oral sex for a man is not always just about the pleasure of the feeling on his tip. In fact it’s not always just about him getting off. Men would just have sex with you if that were the case. Oral sex is about damn near every sense in his body. He wants to feel you. He wants to smell your hair. He wants to watch what you do. He wants to hear the sounds you make. A man who says he doesn’t care about these things hasn’t had a woman give him the best BJ of his life. I say this because all of these things combined drives a man wild. It lets him know that you enjoy what you’re doing and want to make sure he enjoys the entire pleasure package. It also gives him the sense of being deep inside you, which is one of the things men think about the most. Don’t mess with his dreams!

These are the top three things I listed because I’ve heard several men mention these things over the years and then I heard the same opinions just a couple days ago. I completely agree with the third which is why I posted it last, but the other two are posted to give men some awareness of the fact that they might need to open up to some new options. You don’t have to try it, but DON’T knock it until you do.


Friday, November 12, 2010

I refuse

Sometimes you just have to refuse...


Thursday, October 28, 2010

Check yourself before you comment on my posts

Since apparently some people don't know how to read, let me correct what I said so that you can fully understand it. I said I don't want a broke ass man who can't do anything for me. I don't want you to pay for everything in my life and do everything I tell you to do. I want you to BE ABLE to pay for things in my life. I have been in a relationship where the dude didn't have any type of money to support me. I PAID FOR EVERYTHING. I REFUSE TO BE WITH SOMEONE WHO CANNOT PAY FOR SOME THINGS. I REFUSE TO BE WITH SOMEONE WHO KEEPS SAYING OVER AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN..."one day I'm gonna get that for you" and "Hmmm I'll never be able to do that." I believe that everything I want to do will be done. If you don't believe the same of your own goals then you are WASTING MY TIME. I NEVER said I wanted someone to jump up my butt and follow me around throwing money everywhere I walk. If you are going to comment on my blog entries then you might want to make sure you have read them correctly. You also might want to make sure you know my history and know the things I have been through before you go thinking you know what I want.

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Don't Bother...

I had to take some time out of my evening to write this because I am wondering why some of these men really believe they have a chance to be with me. In fact, I am wondering why some of them even think they can talk to me in general. There are several things wrong with you men and I am going to list these negative attributes below. In case you were wondering, yes this is meant to possibly hurt your feelings.

1) I am a strong and INDEPENDENT black woman. I do not need a weakling of a man. I need a man who is going to be just as strong as I am. A weak man with a strong woman is just a little puppy dog. If I wanted someone to follow me around, sniff my butt, sit at my feet, and piddle in the corner I would just buy a damn dog. (At least those are a little easier to train anyway!)

2) Along with this independence comes a great deal of intelligence. If you are sending me messages with words that I have to look up on, then we have a problem. I should not have to, in the middle of a conversation, say “hold on” and go look up what the hell you’re trying to say to me. That’s just a waste of my time.

3) I’m sorry but I do have to pull out some stereotypes on you for just a moment. If your name is Jaquese…and I’m just going to stop there.

4) If you have baby mama drama and you are my age, please don’t bother trying. I am not interested in parenting your child while getting threatening calls from your ex-girlfriend. Just ask my ex. There’s a reason why he’s my ex.

5) If you have been to jail, you should probably NOT lead with this in our conversation. I will most likely walk away without even saying goodbye. I do not have time to sit back wondering when you’ll be getting back from your 10 year sentence for conspiracy.

6) If you have a drug habit, and yes weed is a drug, you need to enlighten me of this ahead of time so I can explain to you that weed does not come before me. If I catch you sneaking into the room to get your puff on, there’s a problem.

7) If you don’t have money…Now wait just one second. Let me specify. I know that if I am dating someone my own age he will probably not be super rich unless mommy and daddy are giving him that money. However, let me put it this way: I do not want to hear “Oh I wish I could get that for you.” Especially if it is something I can buy with my own money. I should not be able to show you up with the money in my pocket.

You know what’s a shame? I posted the first two in one of my previous entries and I know one of these people I’m thinking of definitely read that entry. Why are you still trying? Did you not get it the first time? Should I say it a third time? Maybe I will. Men, if you fit into any of these, please turn the other way when you see me. Don’t even say hello.


Girl Talk

Listen y'all need to know this that we'll straight up go tell your business. So if you're gonna come you better come with it. If you ain't swingin' just put your tongue in it.


I'm Crazy But You Like It

I need a man who knows I'm crazy, but loves it!


Tuesday, October 19, 2010

We were living a lie

After all this time...


I wish we never loved it

I do...


Thursday, September 30, 2010

And the cycle continues...

This is just another of the MANY problems we're having within the gay community. It is horrible to see these people committing suicide after coming out about their sexuality. Why is it that we can no longer live in a world where we are comfortable with who we truly are and those we love? He was JUST starting his life in college. He was talented, but he could not deal with the way people chose to treat his personal life...


When others hate you...

Someone can love every fiber of their being, but if others do not approve we sometimes get down on ourselves. This young boy along with several others was bullied because of his sexual preference. Whether you want to believe it or not, these are still considered hate crimes. He chose to take his life in response to the bullying. I wish people would just get over their pettiness and accept people for who they are. We cannot change the way we were born. He was BORN THIS WAY just as those bullies may have been born straight...


Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Why Laura Chose Urkel

I want to share with you a conversation that I had with one of my good friends.

Her: bleekkk where are the good fellas?

they don't exist
this is the thing
you have to get with the geeks
if you want to be treated right and settle game geeks...artists
my sweetie and his group of friends are like the perfect guys minus their obsession with being geeks lol...but that's what makes them unique
and they're so intelligent. you can have the best conversations with them. I love that they know things I would never have been interested in but they make me want to listen lol
the problem is...we catch these types of guys when some other girl has already dicked them over and it ruins things for us

I completely believe in everything I said above. I believe that most women underestimate the stereotypical “geek” because they believe they have nothing going for them other than the fact that they have this infinite amount of knowledge about "computer processes". Most women see the geek as the ugly Steve Urkel type: suspenders, coke-bottle glasses, high-pitched voice. But let me ask you a question-Who did Laura Winslow choose at the end of the sitcom?- She chose her loveable geek, NOT the sexy, confident clone that he created to please her eyes. I bet you’re wondering “why would she choose Steve after all the years of ignoring his geeky charm?” I’ll tell you why.

Here are the BEST qualities of geeks:

Humbleness- Although they often tend to doubt themselves in social situations, this allows for them to think before they speak. When they think, they’re usually thinking about YOUR needs first. Unlike the stereotypical cocky male figure, who only thinks about how lucky you are to be with him.

Intelligence- It is not just a level of intelligence where you feel like you can have a simple conversation with him that others cannot seem to grasp. With the loving geek you ALWAYS find yourself learning things-you might not have cared about before- but find so intriguing when he tells you. It’s the way his eyes glow when he’s just discovered something so simple yet complex. It’s the way he gets excited to answer questions for you especially if you really don’t understand the situation.
But above everything else: The best geeks are ALWAYS willing to make their princess happy. This does not mean buying your love and affection, which is what most people assume. This means remembering the little things that make you happy.

So why did Laura choose Steve? Because he put himself in the worst situations just to please her. He created a sexy clone because he knew the qualities she liked in a man, including his looks. More importantly, Steve gave up on his popular lifestyle as Stefan in order to be her true knight in shiny armour…or I guess, geek in high-water pants. So who are you going to choose?


Now That She's Gone

You know who you are,
I want to ask you:

Was it all worth it?
Was it worth it to treat me like shit just to be with her?
Was it worth it to LIVE WITH ME and sneak around kissing her?
Was it worth it to tell me you loved me and make love to me then kiss her the next day?

Did she do the things I did?
Would she be willing to cut people out of her life to make sure she could be with you?
Did she even fight to be with you?
Did she love you like I did?
Did she help you when you were down and out?
Did she feed you when you had no money?

Was she there for you when you were down and out?

It’s funny how now that she’s gone you want to be my friend again. Was I not good enough to be your friend when you pretty much left me for her? If I weren’t a loving person, then you and I would never be friend again. Now you’re going through a hard time and SHE’S not there for you, so I am. I believe in being a true friend till the end. No matter what problems we may have had in the past, I will always be there for you….Will she?


Saturday, September 25, 2010

He said, She Said

It's always funny to hear two sides of a story. There's the male version and the female version. It seems as though the male version always seems to be a tad bit more enhanced than the female version. It's best shown in this song. The female gives her recount of the tale as a beautiful love story while the male paints the picture of a tawdry summer love affair....


Friday, September 17, 2010

Just So You Know

If only you saw this....


Friday, September 10, 2010

The Real Me Would....

Sometimes you just have to teach him a lesson ;-)


How I feel towards him

Sometimes you just have to say DEUCES


Monday, August 16, 2010

Do You Qualify?

So, every woman has certain qualities that she looks for in a potential mate. Right now I would like to discuss hose which do not make up the physical aspects…Ok, maybe there will be SOME physical qualities listed.
Here’s my list:

1)Since I agreed to some physical, I would like to list my first request as “a tall man.” I’m not asking for a giant. However, I am only five feet tall. If you do not make me stand on my tippy toes to kiss you, then we have a slight problem.

2)My second request is just as important as the first. You may laugh, but this is VERY serious. I need a guy who loves Michael Jackson as much as I do. Alright, well I realize it is kind of hard to love Michael Jackson as much as I do because I am quite a fan. I will however say that my guy must AT LEAST be comfortable with the fact that I often like to dance naked around the house to a great MJ song. Sometimes I wear a bra and panties, but I am assuming that would not be the problem. My man should be comfortable with these things because my love for MJ is eternal. It will NEVER die. You know one crush that a girl never gets over, MJ is much more than that to me! (Oh and I’m listening to him right now.)

3)While I am a very confident and sometimes slightly cocky person, I need my man to be just as confident in me as I am. Yes, he must be confident in himself, but he must be able to ensure me of just how good of a person I am. If I am ever feeling insecure, he must be able to snap me back into my unorthodoxly confident self.

4)Since I am a very confident person, I need a guy who is comfortable with just how confident I am. I do not TRY to be cocky. I am just very sure of myself and along with this confidence comes a bit of independence. Do not be scared of my independence. It does not mean I could necessarily live my life without you, or rather that I would WANT to. It does however mean that I know how to and am not scared to do so if you get out of line.

5)Now, while I do not NEED you to buy things for me, I do like to be spoiled. I am used to getting most things that I want. I am a bit of a daddy’s girl. If you cannot get me the things my dad can, then I guess you need to step aside. What most men do not understand about me is that the things I want most are not very difficult to get with small amounts of money. I am not the type of girl who wants diamonds, diamonds, diamonds. I am most easily pleased when my guy takes me out for a nice dinner or even cooks for me. That is the thing I want the most: food. If you can provide me with food, I will be perfectly happy for the rest of my life. If you want to surprise me with other gifts I like white roses, (they’re my favorite), then feel free. If you want to get me jewelry, I prefer necklaces because it gives me something to touch if ever I feel uncomfortable.

What I listed above are my top five qualities that I look for in a man. Now I’m going to list what I believe are my top five qualities that I can offer a guy. Watch out though. Most of these qualities show how I would be a great wife!

1)I am a great cook. I like to try new things fairly often. One of the first things I want to do when I move into an apartment with my guy is fill the refrigerator with different foods, all of which I plan to cook myself. I do not want anyone else cooking food in my place unless they are in my family. I love to cook huge meals because I like to see the smiles on people’s faces when they eat my food. Yes, I am that good. If you like to eat like I do, then you’ll be happy with me.

2)I love to clean. I will do the laundry, clean the bathroom, wash the dishes and everything else needed in the house. I have slight OCD. Deal with it.

3)I’m a down ass chick. I would do just about anything for my man especially if he treats me right. I am a very loving person. I treat my man like a king. If you need me to help you with anything, believe me I am there for you. I’m the kind of girl that guys do not let go, simply because I love making him happy.

4)You can be honest with me. I love listening to people’s opinions when it comes to different things. I also love being that person you can come to and expect honesty back. I hate to lie to people. Most people think this is a problem. I believe this is my greatest quality because I could never lie to you about something that truly matters.

5)I am a freak. I will try almost anything in the bedroom, especially for that really special someone. I want to make sure that you are equally as pleasured as I am. You want to try something new? Ask me.

Of course there are way more qualities that I could list about my perfect guy, but I do not want to bore you. Plus, if you think you could be my perfect guy you should probably ask me when you see me anyway.

Saturday, August 7, 2010

My Apology

So, instead of pestering him with constant texts and messages on Facebook I figured I would simply post this apology in my blog for all to see. This way he knows that I truly am sorry and I would admit to the (cyber) world that I was wrong for what I did. Well, that’s if he even sees that I posted this…

Dear _____,
I am so sorry for the way things went between us. Believe me that it was never in my intentions to hurt you in any way, shape, or form. In fact, I loved you so much that I could never imagine myself hurting you in this way. I now understand though why you were, and maybe still are upset with me. I understand why you chose to completely remove me from your life instead of trying to fix things yet again. However, I cannot go back in time and change what I have done. All I can do is apologize and show you that I am truly sorry.

I know that saying “sorry” doesn’t necessarily mean much but I can say something else. I think I must have been taking everything you did for granted. You were a great friend to me and you have never done anything wrong to me. Sometimes I even wondered how you were able to put up with me. I guess that’s true love right there.
I honestly do not apologize for things because I don’t regret most of what I do or say. I did however treat you wrong. I’m not asking you to still be in love with me. I’m simply asking if you can see that I’m sorry and I still care for you very much…Love, D


Best Friends and Best Friends Only

Since I already wrote two blogs about my situation with my best friend and our love affair, I figured I should actually discuss the main issue: can straight girls and straight guys ever truly be friends without some kind of romantic or sexual attraction?

I am going to just say that FOR ME it does not work. For some reason I always tend to have friendships in which either my straight guy friends have some type of sexual attraction to me or vice versa. I am not going to toot my own horn and say that I’m so sexy that the men just come running to me. I am quite sexy; however, this is not why they find themselves attracted to me. I believe that for me, what tends to happen is that I am a very open and honest person and most men find that they can’t find a woman like that nowadays. Most men probably assume that they can’t be their normal disgusting manly selves around women because they assume we’re all little dainty, delicate, precious things. I also put myself out there as a person who is willing to learn different things. I love exploring different aspects of life. If I had never been camping and one of my guy friends invited me to go I would suck up my girly girl attitude and hop in a tent. Some girls would turn down an opportunity to go out into the wilderness with a guy who is interested in them. I am completely open to trying this.

Now when it comes to me being interested in my male friends…HA! There is a simple explanation for that actually: I find that I tend to enjoy my relationship more with a person that I have been good friends with for a large amount of time. After being close friends with someone for a considerable amount of time, I start to wonder if maybe there is more to our friendship. Granted, this doesn’t happen with all of my guy friends. That would just be ridiculous. The close guy friends I had that I developed feelings for were those that treated me best. My boyfriends usually didn’t do the things for me that my best guy friends did. (Boyfriends, step up your game!)
Anyway, what I’m thinking is that some of these things that happen often get misconstrued as having developed feelings for a person or some kind of attraction. I’m not saying that the feelings aren’t real. I am simply saying that a close personal relationship with someone of the opposite sex often confuses the heart…interpreting “love” as being “in love” with a person.

I care for all of my best guy friends and love them very much, but I am NOT in love with them!


Sometimes You Just Have to Move on

I could never say that I would stop loving you, simply because I could never tell that lie.

We’ve been through a lot of stuff over the years. We’ve been friends longer than most of the people I am even close to now. You know me better than most people and I believe that is what has made me vulnerable to you. That being said, I need to confess some things. You already know that I care for you, that I’m in love with you, and that I’d do anything for you. However, I believe that it is time for me to move on. I’ve stayed around for some time, hoping that you’d love me the way that I love you. I don’t think your feelings will ever be as strong as mine.
I’m a great friend. I’m a great girlfriend. I’m an even better wifey. And I think the problem is I was trying to give you all of those things at one time. Not only that, but I was giving them to you when you weren’t quite interested in them or at least that’s what I’m starting to believe. It is now time for me to take all of my good qualities and show them to someone who will appreciate them.
I never expected to have you as my boyfriend. What I did hope to get from you was some kind of passion and respect. I feel as though you have not given much of either.

….This is what I started writing a week or so ago and now I realize I don’t even care anymore. After seeing him a couple nights ago, I realized just how I feel about him. Yes, I might still love him and yes, I really do care about him, but I don’t want him anymore in that way. I have soooo many options out there and most of them would probably treat me better than he has over the years. It has definitely taken me a long ass time to realize this and actually look for something better, but I’m finally doing it. I’m finally happy and content with this decision. I’ve gone back and forth on this for a few months now, but this time I’m ready to stick to the plan.

~Sometimes you just have to move on~


Sunday, July 4, 2010

Safe Sex is Great Sex

Something I have neglected to mention so far in my blogs is the idea of protection when being intimate with a person. I believe this is because nowadays, this is one of the last things many people are thinking about, especially teenagers. I don't believe it is necessarily something that people do not want to discuss. However, I do believe that for many people, it is much easier to avoid topics such as pregnancy and STD/STIs. This is because these things often make us uncomfortable no matter who we might be speaking to. In fact, one of the things I don't even remember discussing much with my family was the importance of protecting yourself. When I became sexually active I was very much informed of condoms and their use, and they were even provided for me in order to ensure that I would not be able to use the excuse of not having them readily available. However, with this comes the discussion of why these things are being provided to me and why I was taught about how to use them. I feel as though that was a discussion that was lacking in understanding from my family members. This occurs in many families because for one, parents don't want to believe their children will be active before marriage, two, parents don't want to believe their children could ever have an incident in which they might forget to use protection, and three, parents sometimes rely on those surrounding them to inform their children of these situations. Along with this comes shame and embarrassment. I believe that we should not be ashamed of the things that are part of our biology. As human beings we have a need for intimacy with others. I believe there is no shame in exploring this.

While exploring our sexuality, we must keep ourselves protected from those things that may harm us. We can do this through many different ways such as female condoms, latex and non-latex male condoms, dental dams and many other barrier methods. Along with this however, I think one of the most important things for us to do is, you guessed it, have regular testing for HIV. I do this every 6 months or whenever I am with a new partner. I believe that no matter what form of protection you are using, the most important thing to do is to get tested.

I wrote this because it seems like people nowadays are just going crazy everywhere. Everyone is having sex with everyone else and I always wonder just how protected these people are being. Yes it is only my business to worry about myself. However, I worry about finding a partner who could have possibly been with some of these people who might not have been as careful about their sexually exploration.

Some websites to check out of course

For women who want more information about HPV and their annual gynecological exams


Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Lovers and friends

At what point should a person stop in order to avoid crossing the line with their best friend?

My best friend and I (whose identity I will keep anonymous although most already know his name) have been friends for about thirteen years, eleven of those years I have spent (on and off of course) wondering if he would ever feel the same way about me that I have felt about him. Many of those years I have also spent sharing some of my “firsts” with him. In fact many of the things I have done and still do with him are things I would never even consider doing with any other man. I trust him and I feel safe and comfortable with him. Over the years these feelings have been slowly progressing. Over the past two years I began realizing that I was falling for him (and falling hard!). I friendship was already on the rocks. With the large amount of distance between us (me in PA and him in NJ), things had slowly been getting complicated. Whenever he would come in town I was looking forward to spending any amount of time with him. For him, this time always meant sex. Because I really cared about him, I continued to have sex with him whenever he wanted. I knew that my feelings were growing and finally decided to end it with him. I cut him out of my life COMPLETELY. And I never looked back. Recently I thought about him and decided to contact him. We began talking again but of course it immediately became about sex. I simply wanted him back in my life and knew that would be the easiest way, so I went along with it. As soon as it occurred, I realized those feelings were resurfacing. It was too late. I couldn’t just ignore them or tell him to leave me alone once again. I finally had the courage to tell him how I felt. I have to admit I have felt much better ever since I’ve done it. In fact, our friendship seems to be getting better, slowly but surely. I even decided to move back home and this seems to be making it as though our friendship will somewhat go back to the way it used to be.

Although our friendship seems to be working out now, I want to pose this question: Is it crazy to think that anything else could ever come from this 13 years friendlationship? Love is not something we can choose. We cannot force ourselves to love or not love a person. It is something that happens naturally. How many people are truly best friends with their life partner before beginning a relationship with them?



One thing that both men and women should realize when dating, is that sharing a bit of too much information can completely destroy any possibility of a further relationship with a person.

Case and point:

Two weeks ago, I was walking out of the doctor’s office feeling very crappy, when I saw a guy walking out of the apartment complex. I could tell from the moment I saw him that he would probably try to hit on me. I decided to step back and pretend to make a phone call while I waited for him to walk away. As I stood there I glanced over my glasses and saw him cross the street. He continued walking down the street, but not without glancing back at me and staring. I stayed exactly where I was and noticed him stop walking. He yelled out to me “Hey Shorty!” That was his first mistake. My name is not “shorty” and I do not respond to names other than my own. I, of course, did not respond and pretended not to hear him anyway. He came up to me like an idiot, and decided to proceed into conversation. The first thing out of his mouth was “My name is Jaquese.” That was strike number two. I told him my name anyway (because he looked quite sketchy) and pretended as if nothing was wrong. He asked me if I was taking class. I told him I had graduated. He asked my major and I responded. I then asked him what year he was in. He told me “Oh, I dropped out.” That was strike number three. I am not interested in someone who is not on my education level or even remotely near it. I then told him I needed to be on my way because I had errands to run downtown. “Oh, I’m going downtown too.” ‘What are you going downtown for?’ “I need to drop off money to my baby mama.” That was strike number four and I wondered why he was still talking to me. You’d probably assume the convo ended after that, however, he continued. I looked at his tattoos and commented on how interesting they were. He said “Oh yeah I have this one too,” and pointed at his right arm. “This one is fake though.” I asked why. His response was “My boy gave this to me while I was in prison.” Strike number five. Did I happen to mention he told me all of this within ten minutes of speaking?

This, ladies and gentlemen, is what I mean by sharing way too much information. While I do believe that when trying to create a relationship with someone, you must be truthful and very open about the things in your past and present, I believe there should be some type of element of surprise. AND some things should just be kept private within the first few dates with someone new.


Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Translate this if you will

This is a song by Monica Mancini-Senza Fine

Senza fine
Tu trascini la nostra vita
Senza un attimo di respiro
Per sognare
Per potere ricordare
Cio che abbiamo gia vissuto

Senza fine
Tu sei un attimo senza fine
Non hai ieri
Non hai domani
Tutto e ormai nelle tue mani
Mani grandi
Mani senza fine

Non m'importa della luna
Non m'importa delle stelle
Tu per me sei luna e stelle
Tu per me sei sole e cielo
Tu per me sei tutto quanto
Tutto quanto io voglio avere

Senza fine
La, la, la, la
Senza fine

I will add more info about the song in order to give proper "citation" lol so you guys know where to look it up because it is a great song and very addicting!


Monday, May 31, 2010

Maintaining your (ahem) area

Most men look forward to intercourse with a woman who is very good at maintaining her pubic area, along with other things. Man of these men hope to engage in sexual activity with a freshly shaven vagina or one with the minimalist amount of air possible. This works out well because most women appreciate the assets of a clean area. Minimal hair allows for less sweat, less smell, and a region that’s easier to wash and keep up maintenance. Most of us keep less hair for these reasons along with the fact that we assume sexual escapades are more warranted when keeping a fresh smelling, manageable non-jungle atmosphere.

Although women are fairly keen on keeping up appearances in that general region, men on the other hand have slowly been losing all sense of how to keep their area clean. This should not be the case since they have two things that we do not have the displeasure of dealing with. For the sake of keeping this entry on somewhat of a classy level, we’ll call these two things by their correct term: testicles. Now men, the sack area is almost similar to areas of fat on the body. When cleaning this area you must lift the testicles and scrub underneath, as well as on top and closer to the penis/shaft area. If you fail to hit the under area of your anatomy with a bit of soap and water there tends to be an unpleasant smell that emits from the general area.

This is an epidemic! Gentlemen, do you know why I consider this to be an epidemic? Because those of you who refuse to keep up even the tiniest bit of maintenance are usually the first ones demanding a little “mouth-hug lovin’.” If you would like your woman, or any other woman to put their mouth, tongue, or any other part of their visage near your no-no area, you have to understand that the sight and smell of that area is going to hit us before we even try to taste it!

This being said, I would like to insert one last thing: I smell good, do you?


Wednesday, May 26, 2010


He asked me if we could 'chill'
I told him we would not be engaging in sexual activity or any kind.
He said that was ok and we should still chill.
I decided to test him a bit more to see if he had hopes of some kind of sexual activity.
I told him I would be hanging out at a friend's house and he was welcome to join me.
His response: "imma hit u up. im still washin clothes and shit"
I told him I no his lies and prefer honesty.
He said he simply had to wait for his clothes to be done.
That was at 9:26 PM.
I did not hear from him again until 12:32 AM when I decided to see what happened.
His excuse: I got called into work.

Now, that was either a lie OR you simply did not have the decency and respect to call and inform me of your plans to go to work. I don't know which one is worse. I do however know that I am no longer interested in the bullsh*t.


Code Words and Phrases...text talk

Just some phrases that annoy me:

I was busy= I didn't feel like talking.

Can we 'chill'= I would like to stick my penis inside of you.

Oh, I forgot= you weren't important enough for me to bother responding.

Imma hit you up= I really don't feel like talking but I guess I have no choice.

Let me him you back later=.....days from now.

Are you on birth control= I do this with other girls too.

I 'luv' u= I don't really have feelings for you, but you put me on the spot.